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#96. estrangement, making a difference & dating women

Writer's picture: Devyn Penney Devyn Penney



Age: 24

Relationship Status:  in a relationship

Occupation:  Speech-Language Pathologist

Income: $75k

Astrological Sign: Leo

 

What is the first thing you do when you wake up? 

Scroll on my phone, as much as I wish that wasn’t the case. I also, I am typically getting out of bed at the last second possible, which means my morning routine is extremely rushed and usually consists of me getting dressed, grabbing something to eat on the way to work, and generally starting the day off rough lol.

 

Have you ever felt genuine fulfillment? When? 

I have two!

1.      Within the first few months of dating my current partner. It was a big lightbulb moment of “Oh, THAT is what love feels like.” It is hard to put into words, but I have always been an extremely indecisive and terrified of commitment, but I have never felt like something was so right.

2.      When a patient I’m working with makes a breakthrough in their ability to communicate or is able to eat again after being unable to for a while. You truly don’t realize how big of an impact communication makes on your life until you’re in a position where you are suddenly unable to. Same with eating- it’s such a social/cultural thing and can be SO isolating for patients.

 

What is your most repetitive, negative thought? 

The people I love are just faking that they love me back. It’s something I’m working on, but that little insecure voice in the back of my head is one persistent bitch.

 

What is your most repetitive, positive thought? 

I make a positive difference in people’s lives, both my friends/family and my patients. I try to make a conscious effort to be as encouraging as possible. I live by, if you think something good about someone, say it out loud! You never know how badly someone might need to hear it.

 

What is one thing that surprised you about adulthood? 

How absolutely freeing it is. I hate it when people say, “Just wait until you’re an adult,” as if it’s a bad thing. You have all the power in the world to make your life what you want; you just have to choose it. That is, of course, very simplified, but it’s true. Money is a huge factor, but to me, going into debt to get a degree I could use was absolutely worth the freedom of living on my own, being able to make my own choices, etc. Not being under someone else’s rule is worth every hard-to-pay bill.

 

What are three things you want to put every woman onto? 

1. financial freedom

2. strong female friendships

3. other women :)

 

Rank the following from most to least important:

money, food, sex, love, and laughter (feel free to explain or don’t).

love, money, laughter, sex, food

Hard to have the rest without enough money.

 

How has your relationship with your parents/ guardians changed in adulthood? 

Oof. Drastically. While I can see them as just people who make mistakes now, I am also unable to grasp how you can choose to abandon a child for who they love. It’s a difficult line to walk—understanding how they were raised and their faith while also holding enough respect for yourself to not accept them not accepting you. I am still struggling with it.

 

When do you feel most like yourself? 

When I’m by myself, cooking dinner, and listening to my favorite music.

 

What is the best compliment someone has ever given you? 

Your sensitivity makes you special.

 

How do you feel about falling in love? 

It’s my favorite thing in the world and the most terrifying.

 

What is one thing you’re sick of hearing?

That I’ll regret my life choices, it’s a). no one’s business, b). no one’s business.

 

How often do you feel alone? 

I think I’m a little too comfortable being alone, so the feeling doesn’t actually bother me.

 

What is one thing you hope everyone experiences in their lifetime? 

Being truly understood, including the not so pretty parts of yourself. True intimacy is terrifying, but so worth it.

 

What is one thing you hope no one has to experience in their lifetime?

Being estranged from family that is still alive. Such a waste.

 

What is the best decision you’ve ever made? 

Moving! Everyone should leave their hometown, no matter for how long. You don’t know what’s out there until you look!

 

When do you feel most at ease? 

When I’m by myself.

 

What does having a successful life mean to you? 

Being surrounded by people I love and who love me, having a small family of my own, and being grateful often.

 

How often do you think about your body? 

When I was younger, often. Now, hardly ever. Body neutrality is something I believe so strongly in. Words cannot describe how freeing it is. Funny enough, when I stopped caring about what my body looked like and focused on what it could do, I lost the weight I’d been so worried about. Also, dating women helped a ton. I had literally never once thought that a partner was too fat, so why did I think that about myself?

 

When do you ask for help? 

Rarely, and it’s a problem. I always feel like a burden.

 

What is something you feel strongly about?

It is truly never too late to change your life.

 

BONUS: Tell me something good. 

Your life is your own :)

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