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#38. cycle syncing, big blessings & being right

Writer's picture: Devyn Penney Devyn Penney



Age: 36

Relationship Status:  Single

Occupation:  Executive Assistant for a municipal government agency

Income:  “The pay is LOL” – Brooklyn 99

Astrological Sign: Capricorn sun, Cancer rising, Aries moon, Aquarius venus

 

What is the first thing you do when you wake up? 

Pray, facial/neck lymphatic drainage massage, play brain games. (I try to stay cozy in bed for as long as possible.)

 

Have you ever felt genuine fulfillment? When? 

Before the pandemic I was invited to participate in a special event with the faith-based organization I’m affiliated with. I was dealing with lots of personal turmoil at the time and notched some modest career successes, but being able to make time to fulfill my spiritual need and being entrusted with this privilege was totally worth it. I drove two hours to the location in silence, just full of gratitude.

 

What is your most repetitive, negative thought? 

That I am never good enough or no one will want me when they have me, no matter what I accomplish.

 

What is your most repetitive, positive thought? 

“No one is me, and that is my superpower.”

 

What is one thing that surprised you about adulthood? 

That people can change their minds at any age and become the best or worse versions of themselves based on the beliefs they feed into. (Also, budgeting actually works, but that’s for another conversation, haha).


What are three things you want to put every woman onto? 

  1. Embracing your feminine energy, especially when it comes to sustaining a stable work/life balance.

  2. Cycle syncing and tracking our lives based on our menstrual cycle. Pussy is power, baby.

  3. Schedule yourself a mental health day once a quarter to do absolutely whatever TF you want. My last one was a spa day to catch up on reading which I could’ve easily done at home. Why not? It’s already hard being a woman; take care of you for a change – the rest can wait!

  4. (bonus) – Get to really know yourself. Dress for your body type, wear the tops that make your breasts look freaking good or emphasizes that ass. Test out the skin care products and scents that work for you. No need to go down the tiktok influencer rabbit hole. Do you, boo.

 

Rank the following from most to least important:

money, food, sex, love, and laughter (feel free to explain or don’t).

love, laughter, food, money, sex (only because, at the moment, I’m practicing celibacy, but if I wasn’t and was in a committed relationship, this would be much higher on the list lol).

 

How has your relationship with your parents/ guardians changed in adulthood? 

Seeing the decline in my parents’ health is painful to watch and endure, and I am grateful my family unit is strong in spite of the pain points. The relationship with my dad hasn’t always been the best, but it’s tolerable. My relationship with my mom, however, has gotten stronger in adulthood. I see how strong she is and for her resilience and patience, putting up with my dad who she’s been married for over 50+ years.

 

When do you feel most like yourself? 

When I get home from work, change out of my work clothes, take off my bra and makeup, and play with my dog.

 

What is the best compliment someone has ever given you? 

Two-way tie between being told I’m a good listener (general) and that I have the nicest softest lips (specific).

 

How do you feel about falling in love? 

I experienced it once in my early 20s and know that it was definitely love. It was amazing, blissful, painful, and exhilarating. I’m not against falling in love at the moment, but I’m confident love will find me, and so will my person. I also have experienced a lot of hard love, and when it happens for me, I know it won’t feel like hard love. Or maybe it’s my millennial rom-com delusion talking; I don't know.

 

What is one thing you’re sick of hearing?

“Patience is a virtue”.  THE WORST.

 

How often do you feel alone? 

A lot of times, but I naturally prefer to be in solitude most days. In the context of feeling lonely, I can point out the worst example: when I was around people, I now know in hindsight, didn’t support me or truly have my back. While I learned from that experience, I also made it a point not to put myself in those situations again. The smaller my circle, the better. It’s made life a lot more ‘boring,’ and that’s how I like to operate nowadays. I feel more at peace that way.

 

What is one thing you hope everyone experiences in their lifetime? 

(Just one?!) Being loved. Hearing your favorite song played live and in person. Receiving flowers for any reason. Watching your favorite sports team score the winning goal in the final. Forgiving and receiving forgiveness from another woman. The best orgasm that will leave you weak in the knees every time you think about it, even if it’s been years since it happened and you don’t even talk to that person anymore.

 

What is one thing you hope no one has to experience in their lifetime?

Any pain or injustice against any human, no matter their circumstance in life. I’m a sensitive soul. The destruction of interpersonal relationships is heart-wrenching. That, and watching all your success go down the drain over one thoughtless act of selfishness (aka, your Oscar slap).

 

What is the best decision you’ve ever made? 

Leaving a toxic job that paid more and forever destroyed my mental health for a job that pays much less but allows me to pursue spiritual activities and get sleep at night because of a clean conscience.

 

When do you feel most at ease? 

When I’m around the people I love the most and who love me back.

 

What does having a successful life mean to you? 

Feeling God’s presence blessing me. When I know I’ve made the right choice I feel at ease. Having divine support, that’s success for me.

 

How often do you think about your body? 

Not enough as I should be. At this point in my 30’s I’ve taken steps to really care for my mental/emotional health and now it’s time to really prioritize my physical health by diet/exercise. I will say this though, I freaking LOVE my legs and my thick head of hair and love being able to show them off any chance I get. Yeah, I’m insecure most days, but I know what works for me any day.

 

When do you ask for help? 

As soon as I sense I’m being overconfident. It’s gotten easier to do this the older I get, no need to be the hero all the time. And it gives me an opportunity to empower and trust people.

 

What is something you feel strongly about?

You’re allowed to feel how you feel. You also don’t have to impose your feelings at the cost of being right over promoting peace. Find the balance between honoring your needs and honoring peace, where peace is welcomed.

 

BONUS: Tell me something good. 

I can’t think of anything profound or wise, but if you want the laugh cause I sure as hell needed it today, here’s a tweet I saw: “Damn girl, are you a Cybertruck? Cause you look stupid as shit.” HAHA!

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