#322. a beautiful relationship, self-discovery & having an empathetic nature

Age: 29

Relationship Status: Married

Occupation: Interior Designer

Income: approximately $350/monthly

Astrological Sign: Capricorn Sun, Capricorn Moon

How are you, really?

I think I’m doing okay - not where I thought I’d be at 29, but learning to love the journey I’m on. I have been on a journey of self-discovery the past few years, and I’ve come to understand that life doesn’t have a manual or one way of doing things, you just have to take it as it comes to you! What a journey it’s been so far…But we move ey?

What is the greatest change you’ve made this year?

Actively choosing to focus on myself fully: physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Selfishly choosing myself without feeling guilty. I’ve never done this before.

What is something you hope never changes?

I hope I don’t change who I am to the core. I feel things deeply and genuinely, and I worry that life experiences will harden me. So, I hope my empathetic nature towards everything never changes.

When do you feel most capable?

I feel most capable when I’m handling work projects. I really enjoy what I do, and I feel really accomplished when I hear a client’s ideas and visions and help them bring them to life. I love it! I hope I get to do this for as long as possible.

How do you nurture yourself?

By giving myself grace every day and reminding myself that everything is okay, I am exactly where I am supposed to be, especially when things aren’t going great in my life. I also make time to do hobbies that I love and things that just fill my cup, like a solo date where I pamper myself.

How do you nurture others?

I nurture others by offering kindness, compassion, and a safe space for people to be vulnerable and themselves. I live by the saying, “Do unto others as you would like others to do unto you,” and I believe this always reminds me to act with kindness no matter who the person is or whether I know them personally.

Is there anything you wish you had said but didn’t?

I wish I had been more open and honest with some of my previous friendships. I have never been good at confrontation- I am better now- and a lot of them ended without any closure for both parties, so I wish I had spoken up and been honest about how I truly feel.

What is something that turns you on?

Hmmm, a good make-out session, neck kisses, and watching my man do ‘manly’ things around the house that definitely does it for me. Oh, and humor from my partner, of course.

What is something that turns you off?

Poor hygiene, inconsistency, rude behavior, and unkindness.

When did you last walk away from something that no longer served you?

Five years ago. I had to walk away from a significant friendship that no longer served me. It was a difficult experience, but it had to be done. We were no longer the same people, and I was okay with growing and changing, but she wasn’t, so I had to let the friendship go. Painful but necessary.

How often do you feel you achieve balance?

I can say I try to do so every day, but some days are easier than others. A few years ago, I realized that I would never reach a point in my life where I feel like I have achieved perfect balance. I believe it’s a never-ending process you need to learn to cultivate. Balance can be achieved daily if you are intentional about it.

What is one risk you took that resulted in reward?

Opening a medium-risk investment account that became an emergency fund account for my partner and me. This is one of the best risks we have ever taken, and it came in handy when I lost my job a few years ago. Best decision I’ve made as an adult so far.

When do you feel most overwhelmed?

When I have a lot on my plate workwise, trying to juggle different tasks at the same time quickly overwhelms me, and making big decisions can get me worked up.

How do you move forward?

By talking and crying things out. It always helps me to let go of whatever is happening. I need to vocalize and just talk about it and cry and I am able to move on pretty quickly once I do this.

What is something that will always make you laugh?

Sarcastic humor, comedy shows and my husband…he’s really funny.

What is something that will always make you cry?

Sad animal videos, another human being crying…anything sad, actually.

I cry A LOT (SMH)!

Have you ever been betrayed?

Yes, by a friend I thought genuinely cared about me. It sucked but I guess it is what it is. We live and learn.

What is your greatest temptation?

All the sweet things: candy, cakes, ice cream, chocolate etc. I have a big sweet tooth, but one of my goals this year is to find alternative healthy sweet stuff. It is tough, though!

What is one thing you feel is missing from your current life?

At the moment, I don’t think there’s anything missing. I am quite content with where I am right now in life, even though it’s not where I aspire to be; maybe I can say I’m looking forward to having more time freedom to travel the world, pursue my passions full-time, and eventually grow my family.

What is one thing you can’t get enough of?

Music is a big thing in my life, and I don’t think a day goes by without me listening to some type of music. I love it so much.

BONUS: Tell me something good.

I’m so grateful for my partner. This is the healthiest and most beautiful relationship I’ve ever been in. It’s easy, free-flowing, and I can always be my authentic self. We celebrated our 7-year anniversary since we met this year, and I couldn’t be happier. It still feels like we met just 2 years ago. He’s my literal best friend, partner, confidant, and friend. Marriage really does work, and I’m forever grateful I met him when I did.