Age: 24
Relationship Status: Single (AF)
Occupation: Restaurant and hospitality publicist
Income: $50k
Astrological Sign: Capricorn sun, Pisces rising, Aries moon
What is the most important part of your daily routine?
My post-work self-care ritual! I take a hot shower, do my skin and hair care, listen to music and truly unplug from the day.
What is your current happiness most dependent on?
The state of the world. It’s hard to disconnect my feelings from what I see on the news.
What do you wish you were less reliant on?
Technology/social media. I live alone, so it’s the main way that I communicate with others, get entertainment, and decompress after a long day at work. One of my goals this year is to be more intentional with my time online and get more hobbies outside of scrolling.
When do you question yourself?
I hardly do these days. I try to maintain a deep sense of trust in the grand scheme of things. Unless something really doesn’t feel right, I usually don’t question it.
What is something that has positively impacted how you perceive your self-worth?
When I was a teenager, I competed in pageants. While they’re known for being shallow and materialistic, it gave me the confidence I needed to break out of my shell and see myself in a positive light. As a woman of color, I found it super empowering to break the traditional “American” beauty standard and usher in a new era of diversity into that community. Since then, I’ve had less self-doubt and find it easier to feel confident in myself.
What is something you have forgiven yourself for?
My impulsiveness. When it comes to self-control, I often swing between extremes; either I’m restricting myself to the highest level or indulging in everything under the sun. I’ve learned to be kinder to myself— and to eat the damn chocolate bar when I feel like it.
What is something you have forgiven someone else for?
Recently, many things. I’ve been quite passive in my life (another habit I’m trying to break) so ex-boyfriends and ex-employers have often given me the push I needed to move on and grow rather than me making the decision to do so myself. I’ve let any resentment go and have grown to appreciate the endings of those relationships, since they’ve all set me on the path I chart now.
How do you ground/center yourself?
Journaling! It’s helped me through some of my toughest times. It’s beyond therapeutic to get all of my thoughts out on paper and lock them away. It’s also a great way to read my past entries and reflect on how far I’ve come.
What is one thing that helped you through your most difficult time?
The wholehearted (and maybe delusionally) belief that my life has a path and a purpose, and that the hard parts are just fleeting moments in time.
Have you ever felt like the best version of yourself? When?
After ending my long-term relationship in 2023, I was able to reconnect with myself and learn about what I wanted. I’m still single, but those initial stages of freedom and independence are times that I’ll forever cherish. It was fun!
What is something you fundamentally disagree with?
The idea that it’s disrespectful to have and assert boundaries.
What is something you know for sure?
That I am a unique and powerful woman who is contributing positively through my existence.
What are three of your non-negotiables in romantic relationships?
1. Independence! I’ve seen so many young women lose themselves in relationships, which is something I have been guilty of in the past, too. When you lose yourself, you lose your power.
2. Accepting the other person for who they are, not who you want them to be.
3. A relationship should be an addition to my life as it is, not my only reason for being.
When do you feel most comfortable in your own skin?
When I’m out with my friends for a night on the town, when we’re together laughing, talking, and enjoying each other’s company, everything feels right. I’m not thinking of what I look like or how I’m perceived— I’m just enjoying life.
Have you ever been in awe of something/someone? When?
I’m really into spirituality, and it all started when I had a friend in high school who was really into seeing psychics. There was a psychic shop in the town over from us, and I remember the first time I ever got a reading; I was so entranced by the entire experience. The movement of the cards, the smell of the incense... It was like I was entering another world. It’s really what sparked my interest in my spirituality, which I hold close and dear to my heart years later.
What is the best (physical/material) gift you have ever received?
My journal. I grew up as a military brat, always moving. In tenth grade, before I moved to a new state, my French teacher gave me a journal as a gift. I still use it.
What is one thing you wish you had said ‘yes’ to in the past?
Especially in college, I wish I had allowed myself to create more meaningful connections. I was in a relationship and spent the majority of my college years in the COVID era, so in some ways, I feel like I blocked myself off from people I could’ve had really meaningful connections with.
What is one thing you will always say ‘no’ to in the future?
Any experience that makes me feel like I have to reduce myself in order to fit in.
What do you believe is your most attractive quality?
My ability to put others at ease. I feel like it’s been a lifelong process of developing my ability to do so. From moving a ton in my younger years to fine-tuning my public and interpersonal skills through pageantry to now having a job that relies solely on communication, it’s been a cool journey. TLDR: I can talk to anyone about anything.
What/who do you want to be when you grow up?
Someone that the younger me would be proud of (she’s extremely hard to please).
BONUS: Tell me something good.
I’ve come to realize that life always has a way of putting you back on track. If something isn’t right for you, you’ll know.
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