
Age: 33
Relationship Status: Engaged
Occupation: OD Advisor
Income: 110,000
Astrological Sign: Cancer
What is the most important part of your daily routine?
Praying & coffee. Otherwise, I feel like my day is off.
What is your current happiness most dependent on?
Stability. I recently got engaged, but before that, I was a single mother...even in my previous marriage. I did everything alone. My life has always felt like I am searching for stability. In a partner, in a home, for my children, in my work.
What do you wish you were less reliant on?
I actually wish I was more reliant on someone or something.
I have hated being let down for so long that it’s hard for me to rely on anyone or anything.
When do you question yourself?
Constantly, I have a fear of failure.
What is something that has positively impacted how you perceive your self-worth?
My education. It has really made me feel so confident and proud that despite all of the bad things that have happened, I was still able to persevere. I’m currently pursuing my Ph.D.
What is something you have forgiven yourself for?
Choosing a bad father for my boys. They deserve better. I wish I had left sooner. I married young and was in an abusive marriage, and I convinced myself they needed him. It wasn’t until I started to see how it negatively affected my son that I realized they really didn’t, and I was teaching them those behaviors were okay.
What is something you have forgiven someone else for?
My mother, for leaving my sister and me when we were small children. She came back a few years later, but those years greatly impacted us.
Being older now, I’ve realized it affected me deeply as an adult and when I became a mother.
How do you ground/center yourself?
Long calls with my sister, my fiancé, or my best friend. Going for a walk, long showers. It’s been a while since I’ve been consistent, but I love working out. It feels so good to get a good workout in daily; I feel whatever I need to feel after doing those things.
What is one thing that helped you through your most difficult time?
My sister. My sister has been the most consistent person in my life and never lets me down. I can’t imagine life without her. We’ve been through everything together.
Have you ever felt like the best version of yourself? When?
I know that change is constant, but it feels like I am becoming the best version of myself right now. I am continuously growing and changing into a better mother, better friend, better sister, etc. I hope that I continue to evolve into a better version of myself.
What is something you fundamentally disagree with?
Whatever your beliefs, no person deserves to be looked down on, discriminated against or killed because of their skin color, beliefs, or where they come from.
Kindness and humility are qualities very dear to me. I truly believe you get back what you put out. That goes for the way you treat people.
What is something you know for sure?
There is nothing or nobody greater than God. My growing, strong belief in God has changed my life.
What are three of your non-negotiables in romantic relationships?
1. Same beliefs, similar views. I learned that these issues will become the issues that cause separation and strife later in marriage, especially when raising a family.
2. Emotional availability. If he’s shutting down, refuses to express himself, or doesn’t have a good relationship with his family, it is a big red flag for me. I don’t find him more masculine and attractive to hide his emotions.
3. Motivation. Having drive and life goals.
When do you feel most comfortable in your own skin?
Anywhere with my fiancé, he always makes me feel safe and gives me a sense of peace.
Have you ever been in awe of something/someone? When?
My mother. She’s experienced so much, she’s overcome so much, and she has grown so much. I’m always proud to say I’m her daughter. Our relationship has come a long way despite past traumas.
My fiancé is the most kind, pure-hearted, caring man I’ve ever met. I never thought I’d meet a man as good as him. I thank God I met him every day. He makes my heart happy.
My two boys have given me my life purpose.
What is the best (physical/material) gift you have ever received?
I’m such a sentimental person. My mother gifted me an emerald ring when I graduated from grad school. I love it so much. Every gift is special to me—even just a handwritten card. I’ve saved all of the flowers my fiancé has given me.
What is one thing you wish you had said ‘yes’ to in the past?
I can’t think of anything specific. I’ve always been a ‘yes’ person, to a fault.
What is one thing you will always say ‘no’ to in the future?
I’ve been working so hard on taking myself out of any situations that make me uncomfortable. I’ve found myself so many times wishing I had just said no.
What do you believe is your most attractive quality?
My eyes, I feel like my eyes really express what I’m not saying sometimes.
What/who do you want to be when you grow up?
A better version of myself.
BONUS: Tell me something good.
Everything is written and will be as it should be. Just be patient. It always works out one way or another. You might not realize it then. You will later.
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