top of page
Writer's pictureDevyn Penney

#177. girlfriends, gut health & connecting to culture




Age: 26

Relationship Status: Single

Occupation: STEM girlie

Income: 80k

Astrological Sign: Capricorn

 

What is your first thought every morning?

Unfortunately, it's “Do I feel bloated/how does my stomach feel this morning?”. The girlies with gut health issues will get it :(

 

What is something you do solely for you?

Bed-rotting with a little sweet treat, wearing comfy PJs, scrolling TikTok, and an electric blanket on. It's one of the closest things to pure peace.

 

What is something you dread?

Going to work for sure. I'm having a quarter-life crisis - my work doesn't motivate me at all, and I feel like I have more energy to give to the world than sitting at my desk between 9-5. I know life CAN'T be about the corporate grind; there has to be more to it!!

 

What is something you are looking forward to?

Finding a partner who I love! I hope it will happen for me one day. Sometimes, I struggle to see it happening, but I'm holding onto hope.

 

When do you feel most accomplished?

When my friends tell me something nice, they say or hear about me during a conversation that I wasn't a part of. It makes me feel proud when people respect me enough to say nice things about me to others.

 

What is something you regret investing in financially?

Anything fast fashion. Human rights abuse isn't okay, even if you can't see it happening in front of you. I think we've become desensitized to it for the quick gratification of cheap clothing. Thrifting all the way!!

 

What is something you regret investing in emotionally?

Girls who I thought were my best friends but, in hindsight, never matched the energy or the effort that I gave them. After years of friendship, they hurt me and ghosted me out of their lives over something that could have been an easy conversation. I learned important lessons, but I still regret wasting my love and energy on them.

 

What are three things you think are absolutely worth the investment?

(financially, emotionally, or time/energy-wise)

1. Female friendships (but the right ones!)

2. Perfume that others notice and compliment you for.

3. Living in a new country or city in your 20s, if you're lucky enough to be able to do so.

 

When do you feel most creative?

Truth be told, I often don't. I have let go of many of the things I used to love as a kid, including drawing, painting, writing stories, crafting, and daydreaming.

 

How often do you compare yourself to others? When?

Every day. I’m Asian and don't match the beauty standards of the very white society in which I live. I generally like myself, but I wonder how much easier it'd feel to be a white girl pretty and receive that kind of attention and validation.

 

What is one thing you’d like to thank your past self for?

Studying hard during school and university. It opened up many opportunities, such as scholarships and moving cities for jobs, which led to the creating great memories.

 

What is one thing you believe about your future self?

That I'm meant to live a fun, exciting, adventurous, fulfilling life. That I will see all the corners of the world, meet amazing people, have incredible experiences, and live in different places. I'm excited for it to unfold.

 

What is one thing you learned in childhood that you have now had to unlearn in adulthood?

Placing utmost importance on my parents’ opinions. Although they have loved me since childhood, they never validated my emotions, apologized, or admitted being wrong. They showed anger with any disagreement I expressed and had such high standards. I always listened for fear of disappointing them and kept my wishes hidden. Now in my mid-20s, traveling solo, moving cities, and growing confidence in my skills and opinions have helped me. I'm learning to sit with their disappointment when I don't listen to them or hold my ground. It's tough. I don’t think they will ever 100% know who I truly am.

 

Have you ever felt pure joy? When?

So many times! When I've traveled the world and seen incredible mountains and beaches or eaten amazing food. When I’m with my best friends. When my dog asks for pets. When I get a cold drink and sit in the sunshine. When I hear a song that I love. When I’m at a concert. When I have music on, and I'm cooking dinner with a glass of wine. The list goes on!!

 

What is something that would feel really good to get off your chest?

I wish I could tell the girls who decided to ghost me and end our friendship just how badly they hurt me. I've moved on (mostly), but a part of me will never feel fully at peace with it. I'll never understand how they could do what they did in the way that they did.

 

When do you feel most in your feminine energy?

When I do my hair and makeup and put on a really nice outfit! It may be cliche, but

there's something about feeling girly and pretty when it all just comes together.

 

What is one interaction that changed your life?

In my previous job, I had to make lots of high-stakes decisions. I would second-guess myself and check every decision with a senior. Once, they told me, “I need you to believe in yourself more and stop asking me; you have the skills and almost always make the right choice.” They were the first to point out that I need more confidence in myself and my reasoning, thinking, and logic. I've carried that with me ever since.

 

What is something you want to give up?

Comparing myself to others and always aspiring to look ‘prettier’ in some way. I want to give it up, but I don't know if I'll ever really be able to.

 

What is something you want to take up?

I want to take up volunteering in some way again. It's not lost on me that society is hyper-individualistic. We get stuck in our own bubbles and forget we're part of something bigger. I'm lucky not to be facing any major challenges or ordeals - I'm not trying to just survive day-to-day, so I have room in my life and heart to give back.

 

What do you believe is a universal truth?

If you consider people your friends but they don't make an effort to really listen to what you're saying, ask you questions, or remember details about your life - they will always let you down eventually.

 

BONUS: Tell me something good.

I'm starting to connect more with my culture. I went through the whole immigrant identity crisis of not feeling enough like either of the two in my teenage years. Now, I'm appreciating the food, language, clothing, and stories in a way I haven't in the past!

3 views0 comments

Commenti


bottom of page